SETH "ICECREAM" KINSTLE
Peanut in 2024
Born	Dec. 22, 1990 (age 34)
Other names	Seth, Ice Cream Man
Subscribers	700K+
Years active	2015–present
Known for	Pissing in his poop
Personality	Badass
Favorite color	Grey

Seth is a deity who grants your wish when you hit his gong. The gong is powerful. When you strike it, the sound echoes everywhere and everything feels alive. People travel from all over the world just to hit this gong because they know it will give them a wish. It can be anything you want, even something you never thought of, but watch out because Seth doesn't hand out normal wishes. He gives you something fucked up.

When your wish comes true, it's never ordinary. Wish for a peanut? You will get peanuts, but maybe now you're too fucking fat to fit through doors. Wish for knowledge? You'll get useless Zelda facts like "Did you know Zelda's real name is Bernard?" You pick up all these random bits, but nothing useful like how to actually win a fucking game. Still, it's not funny and you can't help but frown because it's what you expected. Seth's wishes are never normal. They always come with a fucking trick.

Some say hitting the gong isn't just about the wish, it's about figuring out who you are. Maybe you realize you're a brain-rotted, useless moron, no better than a mangled corpse being dragged around. Seth doesn't just grant wishes. He sends you on an trip. After it's done, you feel AWESOME, like you just played the best round of "HIT SETHS GONG THAT GRANTS YOUY WISHES" ever. It's never what you wanted and it's exhausting. The gong reminds you that life without Seth would be sad.

You might wish for a friend, but Kinstle gives you a friend that talks you into assaulting people.